On the night after the one that found me kneeling and weeping with my face to the pavement at 3 am (I don't really have much to say about it*), I want to post something borrowed from a quiet and wonderful and dogged cancer-fighter blog-friend named Iikka:
"A Quiet Asana."
I will not be frustrated by lack of "progress."
I will take comfort and draw strength from the knowledge that I am well enough to maintain.
I will not hold myself to any standard, schedule, or expectations--my own or otherwise.
I will lean in, do the work, give to receive.
I will not counter pain with tension, anger, or fear.
I will accept the signals my body sends as it works to repair with kindness, peace, and understanding.
I will not complain, doubt, or question.
I will project patience, faith, serenity, and above all, gratitude.
I will not forget the gifts I have been given.
I will remember, every breath I take, that I.am.lucky.to.be.here.
No matter where here is: it is a gift, a blessing, and it is so much more than good enough.
*I really don't. But just so no one goes jumping to conclusions about random muggings or anything else crazy, I feel like I should specify that it had a lot more to do with hormones and fatigue and frustration with the difficulty and the pain and the holy-hell-so-GD-confusedness of life than with anything else.