Today at work I sat and watched clouds of pollen blow by as the wind gusted past the front windows. We're getting a cold front in tonight, and thunderstorms are on the way. Wish I could sleep in tomorrow so I could stay up tonight and not feel dumb about it. Otherwise though the day was so boring that I spent my time singing to myself and dancing around whenever no one was looking. I have been, as I said, very excited about Camp. I'm still excited, but I'm a little worried about being so close to David. I don't know how to make or let it be okay.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Well, I just got conned into seeing The Last Song with Kelly and Taylor and Christina, and I am wrecked. It was good. I mean, it was a Nicholas Sparks movie, and as such it was what one would expect. The whole "important character dying" thing didn't throw me as much. I mean I expected it, but I've had years to build defensive walls about sad dad-dying things and it's hard for such a formulaic movie to bypass those. I also should have expected (and did expect) the perfect-boyfriend, true summer love stuff, but I didn't expect to be hit so hard by it. It was okay for a while, but then toward the end I suddenly felt like I was blindsided by a semi. As soon as the movie ended I went and cried in the back stall of the bathroom. Then I drove home wanting to smash and throw and kick things and tear things apart and scream. When I grow up I am going to need a soundproofed "smashing shit" room just for me.