My throat hurts from crying. What the hell? How long has this been? Six months? And my throat hurts and head aches from wailing near the top of my lungs to this empty house. What happened to me feeling like this was bad but bearable, and all for the best? Can I get that back? Not that I want to, but I'd probably thank myself for it later. Sometimes I want to grab him by his ear and drag him to this desktop, throw him in a chair and say, "read this fucking thing. Read what you have been doing to me with all your 'you're so awesome, but we can't be together' bullshit," in true prima donna fashion.
Because he doesn't read anymore, except very rarely. Because it's unhelpful, because evidently I am "still" some sort of obsession. Just not the dateable kind. Listen to me. I am ridiculous. Why should he be reading this at all? The whole point anyway is that it's optional for all involved, and there is certainly no reason that David should torture himself (much less be expected to) over doing what he thinks is right. And anyway, when I read back, the things I've written are so far from measuring up to what I actually felt that they feel dry and emotionless to me. I probably need a slap in the face. Someone to yell "snap out of it!" and shake me by the shoulders, and hope I don't punch them in the kidneys and then knee them in the face as they go down.
In other news, here is some mold-breaking, boundary-crossing, pigeonhole-destroying art. This guy is not a skateboarder, he's a dancer. (And evidently best friends with a filmographic artist.)
Skateboard Tricks That Shouldnt Be Possible - Watch more Funny Videos
My friend Aby Page posted this on facebook earlier, from break.com.